Dissecting the difficulty of same-sex attraction

On November 13, 2014 I posted some musings about same-sex attraction. The conversation of same-sex marriage and homosexuality and bigotry and sin has continued to grow from what began as a whisper over backyard fences to fury-filled screams in the streets and in the courts.

Part way through that posting I shared that I could speak from a position of authority on the subject as I, too, am wired to find the same gender more appealing than the opposite. My goal was to show that there are people who can see and understand both sides.

megaphoneMaybe to turn down the volume on the din so that people could unplug their ears and listen.

Converse.

Understand.

Respect.

I was actually surprised at the flurry of activity it generated. Not the actual topic of same-sex attraction, but the side point that I individually worked to overcome it every day.

It made me wonder: why was it a bigger deal for the viewers to read about my struggle than it was for me to actually share it?

I think it’s because all the way around, this is a big deal. Continue reading Dissecting the difficulty of same-sex attraction

What’s old is new; what’s new is old

I have always loved music and dance. I used to tell people that it was woven throughout my soul while tapping my toes and aching to get up and moving. Now I just close my eyes and let the melody fill me up.

Age will do that to you.records2

When I was a kid my sister had an amazing record collection. Her tastes were a little eclectic so we were exposed to quite a balanced variety.

My mom had a pretty good 8-track collection that she played on the same stereo. We all groaned when she would assert the equal-time rule between what we considered to be our music and her music.

She liked all that old stuff; the instrumental, some Jim Nabors, you get the idea. We called it “elevator music” and mocked it every chance we could get away with it.

But when it was our turn, that record player was turned up and we danced and danced and danced around the living room, into the kitchen, up and down the stairs, and anywhere else that we could still hear the beat. Continue reading What’s old is new; what’s new is old

Being bipolar is tough. How do I keep fighting when I don’t have any fight left in me?

A week or two ago Ann and I made our now very familiar trip to the doctor in Salt Lake. After years of searching and trial and error, we really feel that we have a team we trust that is on our side, helping us navigate these wild and crazy waters.

I have found that I have a bottom-line test for how things are going: I ask myself if I can I do this long term.muscleman

Now, not to brag or anything, but I’m a pretty tough nut.

Okay, how could that be anything but bragging?

Oh well, moving on.

I can take a lot. I’m pretty clever and can usually find ways to adapt and make my new reality work for our family. Pain is certainly relative. I’m always sure it can be worse.

Continue reading Being bipolar is tough. How do I keep fighting when I don’t have any fight left in me?

Where is the front line in the battle of good and evil?

Like many of you, our family has kept up with the Lord of the Rings and Hobbit stories, told both through literature as well as film.

In each segment of the tale, there are these incredible battle scenes. The numbers of the foe seem as countless as the sands of the sea.???????????????????????????????

At first, I always thought how fanciful this was. How on earth could there be armies that large?

But as I finish up reading in The Book of Mormon again I am reminded that millions fought, and millions died.

And not just once. This was repeated.

Not so fanciful anymore. In fact, soberingly real.

This may be how people imagine Armageddon; that great and last battle between the forces of good and the forces of evil.

But instead of millions, there will be billions. Continue reading Where is the front line in the battle of good and evil?