A life that hurts vs. one that just sucks

This is part 4 of a 4-part series on Simplifying the Semantics of Suicide

For part 1, click here

“The solution to all of life’s problems can be found in the Gospel of Jesus Christ.”

I absolutely know this to be true.

There is pain in life. It hurts. Sometimes it hurts a lot. Sometimes it feels like it is more than we can overcome. Sometimes it all becomes too much.

Sometimes we simply ask to get off the ride.

But, if we have made it to this point, it means that we are still buckled in and heading up the next incline on the roller coaster.

We’ve committed to stay on the ride.

roller coaster2

So, what now?

What comes after we’ve understood, we’ve loved, we’ve watched out for, and we have succeeding in saving?

After being right on the verge of plummeting off the cliff for so long, I sometimes worry that we don’t know how to come back from the edge.

And then to just keep walking.

We may want to just forget it all happened so that we can return to normal again. But there is no going back. It is what it is. Truthfully, we must always be vigilant lest we get too close to the edge again.

But does the danger really have to be front and center all the time?

I tell you emphatically NO.

At this point it all becomes about being willing to risk again – willing to risk letting go of the tether of imminent danger and finding our way among all the rest of those on the ride who each have days that are hard, sometimes really hard.risk


Willing to risk being just like everyone else, but in our own way.

Scary, I know.


“To laugh is to risk appearing a fool,

To weep is to risk appearing sentimental.

To reach out to another is to risk involvement,

To expose feelings is to risk exposing your true self.

To place your ideas and dreams before a crowd is to risk their loss.

To love is to risk not being loved in return,

To live is to risk dying,

To hope is to risk despair,

To try is to risk failure.

But risks must be taken because the greatest hazard in life is to risk nothing. The person who risks nothing, does nothing, has nothing, is nothing.

He may avoid suffering and sorrow,

But he cannot learn, feel, change, grow or live.

Chained by his servitude he is a slave who has forfeited all freedom.

Only a person who risks is free.”

William Arthur Ward

At the end of the day, I think that is what pushes us to suicide: wanting to become free.

risk2Free from the pain, free from the madness, free from the confusion, free from the fear.

But I truly believe that suicide only freezes us inside of what we are trying so hard to escape.

No, the true freedom doesn’t come from dying. It comes from living.

Living comes with risk. It is messy. It is unpredictable. It is constantly changing.

But it is also amazing. It is filled with more joy than any of us could have dreamed of. It offers boundless love and connections and opportunities. It is the only way we discover our families and who they are.

And who we are.

Jesus embracing

Because “The solution to all of life’s problems can be found in the Gospel of Jesus Christ.”



                    (Source: LDS Media Library)

I won’t kid you, it’s still going to be hard.

It’s still going to hurt.

Sometimes a lot.

But it doesn’t have to suck.

See the difference?


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