Tag Archives: bullying

To the bully

This is part of a series of letters to those who may feel lost. Sometimes when we are down, discovering something in the mailbox is just the thing.

It reminds us that we aren’t as alone as we think.

However, today I write to a young woman who feels safely distanced enough through Internet anonymity to mindlessly type words to one such as Lily and then hit send.

textingI’m tempted to not dignify her with a name, but that always gives more power to the deceiver. It’s important that we put both a name and a face with the painful text. After all, someone who really knows who they are would never hide behind secrecy.

Let’s call her Ashley.

Ashley,

I know what you’ve been doing to Lily.

I see you shrug your shoulders and say “it was all a joke, it really isn’t that big of a deal – besides everyone was doing it.”

My first instinct is to grab you and shake you so hard that your teeth rattle and then scream “What is wrong with you?”

Okay, it would also be my second.

And my third.

It is NOT a joke.

It really IS a big deal.

Fist beating into Water, vertical, splash

And right now, I’m dealing with you – you can’t hide anymore behind this nameless group called “everybody.”

So, I’ll punch the wall, pace for a few hours, and take some calming breaths.

And quietly ask again:

“What is wrong with you?”

Continue reading To the bully

To the teen who is bullied

This is part of a series of letters to those who may feel lost. Sometimes when we are down, discovering something in the mailbox is just the thing.

It reminds us that we aren’t as alone as we think.

Wet paint thrown onto white paper.

Today I write to a young woman who faces shameless cruelty each day. The torture she endures shakes the very foundation of her individual worth – a worth of value beyond imagination but denigrated into dust that disappears in the violent winds surrounding her.

Let’s call her Lily.

Dear Lily,

The very, very, very first thing I want you to read is this:

YOU ARE VITALLY IMPORTANT. YOU ARE WORTH FIGHTING FOR. I AM SO DEEPLY SORRY THAT THIS IS HAPPENING TO YOU. YOU ABSOLUTELY DO NOT DESERVE THIS VINDICTIVE VENOM.

I’m going to repeat that last part: You absolutely do NOT deserve this vile bullying.

Continue reading To the teen who is bullied