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Is there ever a state of normalcy with mental illness?

Ann and I are getting ready to make the trek to Salt Lake next week to check in with our psychiatrist.

For quite a while now I have felt frustrated that we are continuously tweaking and changing and figuring it out. I just want to have life go back to being normal and constant and predictable.

Is that too much to ask?

So, once again we are getting ready for the changes that are sure to come.

I think the phrase “getting ready” is appropriate in this case. Some people may be able to just get up, gas up the car, and head for Salt Lake.

But not me.calendar

My usual preparation involves tracking every day how things have gone: calm, screamer, numb, manic, angry, laughing.

You get the idea.

Then I type a paper with the percentages of each, and compare them to the last visit’s statistics. I also type up a few paragraphs of things I would like to share with the doctor. I have found that this system is very efficient and practical. The doctor can be up to speed in less than two minutes rather than stumbling through my ramblings.

Just to make sure, I’ll read and retype and reread and retype. No mistakes. No miscommunications. Perfection.

From my perspective, this is extremely logical and rational.



Apparently, though, I am in the minority on that one.

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